Minister's Message

April showers bring May flowers… We live in Florida so we have flowers of some kind most of the year, but May will bring us our annual Flower Ceremony service! Please bring one or more flower(s) to share on May 10 – I’m not sure if it’s genius or very much not that I’ve scheduled the Flower Ceremony for Mother’s Day.

Our spiritual theme for May is “Awakening Curiosity.” I feel personally challenged by this theme, as I tend to need extra support in finding creativity as we near the end of the program year. It has been fun, so far, to think about creating meaningful worship services that will engage us and the theme. I have some activities planned that I hope you find connects you with one another, our faith, and That Which is Greater Than We are.

I have always been a curious person. I like to know how things work – both the micro and the macro, and how to move from one to the other. I like to know what the rules and processes are so I know how I can be creative with them – like a great artist knows which rules to break and how, to make something new and different.

UUs are generally curious people, and we sure do ask a lot of questions. What a blessing to be part of a faith where questions are celebrated at least as much as some answers.

And while this program year is almost over, please do be thinking ahead to next year – I’d love to have some volunteers for the “View from the Pew” (lay reflections or activities) element of the service.

I look forward to exploring “Awakening Curiosity” with you this month, as I do to seeing you or connecting with you soon!

I keep wondering what to write about for this month. While I am fine, so many of my colleagues are going through some really hard times, and I have been called on to hold space for them in their sadness, frustration, anger, and uncertainty. It's reminded me to be gentler with myself and with others, knowing the hardships they are going through -- and often the hardships the people they love and serve are going through as well.

I've recently been in for some appointments -- the normal things we have to do to make sure we care for our bodies as best we can -- and have been surprised to get compliments on my clothes. The colors and patterns have been so warmly received.

It reminded me a little of being a chaplain. Hospitals tend to be on the cooler side, and my work involved moving throughout the medical center, so layers were a good idea. But layers in hospitals can be tricky. I had these two bright colored wraps, multi-colored pieces with peafowl and long plumes of feathers, that I would wear. Visually it set me apart from other providers, as almost everyone else had to wear scrubs, and I figured if nothing else, I could provide a little change up to the day with something colorful and attractive.

I also appreciated how the wraps set me apart from other providers. Unlike doctors and nurses and social workers and so many others, chaplains have the luxury of not having an agenda. There's no assessment to fill out (caveat: VAs do have assessments, but not the way other providers have), no checklists to go through. Chaplains are just there to support the patient and their loved ones, along with providers and staff. There's a lot of training available, although only a little training is often what is required. We're just there to be present to the patient's needs. And I tried to offer them something of a visual respite even if they didn't want to talk.

Anyway, many people are hurting and seeking connection these days. Maybe more than we realize. April's theme is “Embracing Possibility”: may we all embrace possibilities for comfort, ease, and healing as we go about our days.

And as always, I look forward to seeing you and/or connecting with you soon!

I've been following themes from a small organization for years now. I've always liked them. The monthly themes are interesting, and give me something to launch my ideas from. I look forward to using a given month's theme as a lens for engaging with holidays and holy days and different topics. The variety of themes over time has a way of encouraging different insight than simply considering the various days without that lens. Somewhat like using a lectionary but better (at least for me).

March's spiritual theme is Paying Attention, and while I love the theme, I'm finding myself resisting it. I am mentally preoccupied right now, as I plan for worship services across two months and the need to switch services around to make sure they align with each congregation's annual meeting and stewardship campaign. Of the 6 Sundays I'll be in the pulpits in March and April, only 3 Sundays will I be preaching the same service at both congregations.

That's what I'm paying attention to, even though my instinct is to quiet, to observe, to clear my mind, and to... pay attention. I have always been an attentive person, listening and learning. It's one way that I made a good chaplain: people felt that they had all my attention as they were speaking, because they did. It was even more affirming in a hospital setting, where people are always coming and going, in and out of rooms, and having someone just be willing to be devoted to simply being present to them.

March 1 we'll be celebrating our newest members and everything so many of you do to make TriUU such a wonderful place. Be sure to stay after the service for bagels and the annual meeting. Then the following week — on Spring Forward Sunday (March 8) — you'll want to get up and get to the service. My friend and colleague Liz James, who founded the UU Hysterical Society you've probably joined if you're on Facebook, will be leading the service. She will also be the speaker at our monthly Forum on March 12. Twice in one week? Yes! Liz is wise and funny and you won't want to miss the chances to get to hear her speak.

And a reminder — during the Feb 22 worship service, I reminded TriUU members and friends that we have a Health Crisis and Advanced Planning form available that you can complete and give to me (or Nancy Garrison) or leave in the box outside my office. There are a number of them on file, and most of them pre-date my time with the congregation, so it might be a good idea to update them if this is something you'd like us to have. Printed forms are available at the church, and Nancy has sent them out with our weekly church emails, if you'd prefer to type and print at home.

As always, I look forward to connecting with you soon or seeing you at church!

I've been thinking lately about a story a colleague once shared. They were in a congregation that said they wanted the minister there, but the minister often felt like things weren't quite right. One example they shared was of a congregant who regularly seemed disappointed and frustrated with the minister, although the minister had no idea what they had done to merit this.

There was a group gathering once, near the end of the minister's time with the congregation, as it turned out, and a conversation unfolded in the group about what the roles of the minister and congregation -- both as a whole and as individuals -- were. In that conversation, the congregant said that the minister never did their job. Surprised, the minister asked what they meant. The person replied that when they were growing up, their family's minister would stop by for dinner sometimes. This minister never did, and therefore, they weren't doing their job. I've wondered if the minister of their memory actually showed up uninvited, or it just seemed like it to the child.

The congregant had never invited the minister to dinner, only faulted them for not meeting expectations that the minister (or anyone else) was aware of. It didn't occur to the person to express their expectation to the minister or to extend an invitation.

We all experience this kind of mismatching of expectations throughout our lives -- during the holidays, this happens for many people, but at other times as well. Sometimes there are real failures -- I'm thinking about how my father wasn't told he'd had a heart attack last year by any of his medical care providers. Sometimes, it's that we assume there has been communication about something when there has not been.

James Luther Adams wrote that, “Church is a place where you get to practice what it means to be human.” And thank goodness for that, because we have a place where we get to practice and be held in Love, even when we mess it up, and then try again. 

As always, I look forward to seeing you at church or connecting with you otherwise. 

In January, we celebrate the beginning of a new year... although for congregational life, it's more like smack dab in the middle. We will be seeing more of our snowbird friends return -- and how lucky are we that some have already come back? Their presence may help ease the sadness of letting go of some of our longtime and beloved members, who are moving for various reasons.

The spiritual theme we'll be engaging in January is "Practicing Resistance." It's a theme we've explored some in the past, and one that we'll surely continue to explore in the future. It seems to be a factor of the times we find ourselves living in, but also one I believe UUs as a whole are beginning to take more seriously as a matter of faith. It surfaces questions like, "What do we want the future to look like?" and "How do we act in a way that helps make that vision real?" and "What do our Shared Values tell us about how to be in the world?"

This month, TriUU will also be launching its annual stewardship campaign, headed by the enthusiastic and gifted Pat Felton. Be prepared to hear messages about how great a place TriUU is (as if you didn't already know), as we wonder together as a congregation where we want to go in the future.

One of my favorite acts of resistance is cross-stitching. It probably sounds very little like resistance, but I maintain that the creation of beauty in the world is a powerful act of resistance.

Speaking of cross stitching, I'll be on vacation through January 10 (with luck... there's a lot that needs to get done for that to happen). I won't be traveling, so I'll be available for pastoral emergencies. While I'm away, please remember that I will not be contacting you by email or text with weird, "urgent" requests for gift cards or anything else.

I look forward to connecting with you again when I return!

While October is probably generally my favorite month, I also love December. Even when it's hard, which it often is, largely because there's so much going on, and as a religious professional, a little more than usual. As I was planning for the month's services, I felt like I was trying to push water uphill or nail jello to a tree. Hopefully, the wrestling will yield services you'll enjoy and find meaningful.

This month's spiritual theme is "Choosing Hope." I sometimes wonder, when there's a verb and noun construct, how I might approach the themes differently if the verbs were changed -- like instead of last month's "Nurturing Gratitude" and December's "Choosing Hope," what if it had been "Choosing Gratitude" and "Nurturing Hope"? I don't think I like that better, but it does make me wonder.

This month, we'll be exploring the theme through the lenses of Advent and Winter Solstice, and Yule, and you'll have an opportunity to ask me questions during one of our services. And Christmas Eve will again be at 4 pm this year. During that service, we will be taking a collection for the Minister's Discretionary Fund. (Please see the info about that in its own column.)

As we approach the end of the year, I want to say thank you. Y'all are such a great congregation and wonderful people, doing such great things in a difficult time, caring for and supporting one another, and working hard to make this an island of sanctuary in a hurting and hard world. You are a blessing.

And as always, I look forward to seeing or hearing from you soon!